Adulthood. For real.

University would have to be the second or third greatest adventure yet. It’s fun and carefree and there is plenty of time for supplementary adventures. Unfortunately this incredible time of being able to use youthfulness as an excuse for doing stupid things is coming to an end. I’m in my final year and will soon face the daunting task of finding a real human job and becoming an actual adult with responsibilities. It sounds terrible despite the alluring prospect of earning real people money rather than part time casual shift worker money. The whole way through my course D’mitry has been on scene, adventuring throughout the mundane days and the super exciting ones, often finding his comfortable little place inside my backpack as I bounce between lecture theatres and coffee spots. It’s really sad to think I won’t be able to do this for much longer. The amount of sadness is almost equivalent to my current feelings about the second demise of Blink 182. Reading all about that felt like a child having their parents explain why they’re splitting up (but not nearly so traumatic) and my only consolation was knowing that at least I still have Jimmy Eat World and Birds of Tokyo.

As I said, I’m not convinced I like the idea of joining the real world. I feel like that means I would need to cook real meals every single night and not get lazy and decide steamed vegetables and fried egg is adequate for a whole week. And I certainly can’t decide halfway through the meal that perhaps I was overly optimistic in thinking that a small person like me could eat a whole giant carrot and over half a head of broccoli in one sitting. Real adults get food proportions right, don’t they? Luckily for D’mitry he doesn’t have to worry about any of this because little plastic dinosaurs don’t require sustenance and even if they did he is a t-rex so dinner for him would simply require tearing up chunks of raw meat from whatever woodland creatures he happened to stumble upon.

I have also realised adults in the real adult world are restricted to weekends for adventuring. I have been known to spend many a week night barbecuing at all hours of the night and still managing to get the kayak out for an hour or two the next day. I know university students are renowned for their ability to party hard all Tuesday night and still manage to stumble into a dimly lit lecture theatre with sunglasses on the next day but I’d be lying if I said I frequented this situation. I was more inclined to staying up late by an outdoor fire pit while wishing it wasn’t too dark to capture D’mitry’s delight in the moment. My point is that now I’m on the verge of being a real adult my days of midweek late night pursuits are numbered and this is a dreadful concept.

I could go on about my reluctance to shoulder the respectable responsibilities of a real adult but I won’t. I’ll just have to accept that my adventuring with D’mitry will be restricted to weekends (along with the rest of the adult world, damn I hate crowds). At least I know I’ll be earning enough money to fund bigger and better adventures and who knows, maybe one day I’ll decide being grown up is absolutely as overrated as I thought it would be and take off on an untimed, unlimited adventure like nothing D’mitry and I have seen before. But to be honest I’ve already decided being grown up is overrated. If I could be twenty-two forever I’d seriously consider it.


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